| >> | Shydale Суббота 06 Снт 2014 02:35:41 Сб 06 Снт 2014 02:35
No.
960032
122 [Мод]
Все еще пытаюсь читать Murky Number Seven. Не смотря на редкие отсылки к сериалу и вообще общедепрессивный настрой фанфика, единственная явная отсылка к сериалу отыграна просто на 10 из 10. Фактически перепевка "Find a Pet Song", только тут она "Find a Gun Song".
(я вырезал большую часть действий оставив в основном "песню")
Тем кто не знаком с фанфиком, Мурки - урожденный раб. Миниатюрный, худой и очень слабый, настолько, что не может держать оружие как обычные пони. Так же не умеющий читать и писать, не имеющий магии. Его всегда чмырили и чмырят стабильно на протяжении фанфика.
Blunderbuck danced his way into it, springing from hoof to hoof before spinning to face me, a rather too large smile on his face as I trotted in, wide eyed.
“Oh, Murky my dear, I cannot express my delight! It's abundantly clear that somewhere in here is the gun that will fit you just right!”
“I...uh...can't wait to get started. But first, can I say a few things? It's kinda important the gun that I get, is something that's quiet and small...”
“Quiet! Small! Got it!”
“I have so many wonderful firearms, just wait! You will see!”
“Can I have something that fires a small bullet, so it won't hurt me?”
“Sure! How 'bout a shotgun? It's loud and proud and powerful as can be!”
“...loud, proud? Have you even seen me?”
“Ah...well. Murky, have faith!”
“You see I will bet you...that somewhere in here is the gun that will get you! Come on! I've got everything from mouth held to battle saddles!”
I gasped on the spot. Yes! “Battle saddles sound good! I'd like one of th-”
“Really? Because I think this big magnum has your name written all over it! Aww...look it matches your mane!”
“Uh...pass.”
“I have so many wonderful choices for you to decide!”
“There are big launchers and guns for massive fun!”
“Launchers and big hunting guns are not quiet!”
“Maybe not...but I've heard of this particular shell launcher throwing people ten feet in the air when it lands!”
Urgh...this buck was just insane. I'd likely be better off asking Glimmer if I could borrow her backup pistol again. I stood up, crawling out from under the pile of firearms and weapons.
“That's all, I think...I'm gonna head outta here and-”
“Wait! There must be a gun here that will fit the ticket, how 'bout a minigun or a nice flamer?”
His magic pulled them out, holding the massive weapons beside him. True to Mosin's tale before, I could see a sniper scope on the flamer. What was with this...
...wait...
Those weapons were attached to battle saddles! Eee! Maybe he had one in my size!
“Smaller and lighter!”
“Smaller, lighter, right!”
“I've got just the thing in this box, Murk! Meet your new fabulous big sniper!”
“It's...just a big and loud sniper...”
“Not just any big and loud sniper! A silenced big and loud sniper!”
"So...um...like I said...”
“Blunderbuck, please...these won't do it. Any gun in my mouth will just hurt me...I need something on a saddle, something tiny! With recoil that won't make me defy gravity!”
“Hmm...I'm sensing you want a gun that's small...”
“You think?”
“I have plenty of wonderful guns that'll go by your side! Like a sweet combat shotty or a giant dual IF-9!”
“Better, but smaller!”
“I see...well how bout a carbine, or a sawn off or a pistol? There are so many wonderful firearms the likes of that.”
“Or there are plasmas and lasers...they have both no recoil! Or perhaps what you need is a hushed and poisoned dart?”
“Now you're talking!”
“Hm...but instead of just one stand out...now that's too many...”
“Not a bad problem to have if you ask me!”
“The darts would be awesome...but the carbine I'm liking too...do you have something in a longer ranged dart?”
“No...but I've got a dart that's less than lethal, if them dying's not for you!”
Argh, so much choice! “Oh...what to do...what to do...OH!”
“Of course! That's it! There's really just one way, to find the gun that really suits me best!”
Blunderbuck's eyes widened, seemingly confused as I hopped into the racks and racks of small pistols, searching and searching.
“A shiny pistol! That's small! Quiet and polite...that will fit on this saddle just right!”
“Don't forget style! That should be considered!”
“So we know for sure it won't sparkle and glitter?”
“For the one who is sneaky and small...”
“Just like me!”
“It might hold much less, but it feels the best!”
“Cos it's all measured up just for you, see?”
“This is the number one, greatest and perfectest saddle in the world for me!”
“Then let the mission begin...and may the best side win!”
|